“The Batman who Went to Fetch a Cake”

By Lt Col (R) Zahid Shah (46 PMA)

Lt Col Zahid Shah, 46 PMAEditor’s Note: Lt Col (R) Zahid Shah is from AC (Parent unit 29 Cav, commanded 41 Horse). After the retirement, he has settled in Rawalpindi.

Kharian Cantt railway stationBack in 1977-78, my friend’s unit (an AK Regt, I don’t recall the unit number) moved to Kharian from Kashmir. An officer called on him in the BOQs and he told his batman to take his bicycle and get a cake and some biscuits from the M Block bakery, which was a 10 minutes trip.

After an hour, the friend started insisting that he had to leave and as they were saying good byes, in rushed a sweating and panting batman with the goodies.

The officer asked him, “Why did it take you so long, when I had told you to take my bicycle?”

He sheepishly replied, “Sir,issi wajah say tou may late ho gaya”.

“How come?”, the officer asked.

The batman said, “Sir, mujhay tou cycle chalaana hee nahi aata.”

The officer asked angrily, “Then why did you take it?”

“Sir, aap nay order diya tha kay cycle lay ker jao”, he said innocently.

The guest who was still present, burst out laughing and so did the officer at the simplicity of the soldier. However, it saved him from the embarrassment and added colour to the occasion. Thanks to the arrival of his batman at the nick of the time and saving the evening!

Kharian Cantt: Main Entrance o

Related Pages:
Humour in Uniform
Army Jokes (in Urdu/Punjabi)
Pakistan Army Blog (Retired Officers)

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  1. Lt Col (R) Qadeer A. Ch., 24/29 Punjab says:

    This is called obedience to lawful command by a true soldier. Well done.

  2. Arshad Ansari says:

    Remember sir, “Beth meray kol, mein tainoo takda rhawan……”?

  3. Major (R) Munir Ahmed, FF (2nd SSC) says:

    Dear Col Zahid,
    Thank you so much for sharing an amazing anecdote. Obedience to command seems to be at its best.

  4. Maj (R) Khalid Saeed Shah, Arty says:

    Dear Sir,
    Decent and simple one you provided us a reason to smile, a rare commodity these days. Indebted sir. Stay Blessed.

  5. Interesting – Army of bygone days is full of such anecdotes – but not anymore as men of today are quite smart and intelligent.

  6. Col (R) Azam Qadri, AC says:

    Dear Zahid,
    Lovely anecdote indeed. I miss Kharian days as well as I was posted as G-3 8 Armored Brigade (Dec 1971 till Jun 1974) and lived in BOQs converted as MOQs and was most sociable with the SPEARHEAD officers, including you.

    • Col (R) Arshad Nazir (28 PMA) says:

      Dear Azam Qadri,
      That had happened to my batman too when I was also in 8 Armd Bde.

  7. Thank you,
    This simplicity is also historically renowned as being chracteristic of the South Asian warrior’s faithful execution of orders – as understood.

  8. Col (R) Shahid Kureshi (46 PMA) says:

    Our ORs are still predominantly simple and innocent souls. I have a few real life anecdotes also but I am sure they will not find their way past the censors. Thanks for sharing and stay blessed Zahid Shah.

    • Dear Col Shahid Kureshi,
      Yes, you are right, the ‘Censor’ of my website is very strict because the motto of this site is:
      “A simple & decent site for all the family members”.

  9. Maj (R) Hasan Jawaid, USA (1st SSC) says:

    That was really funny. Despite a changed mindset today, I am sure we would find such simple souls even in this day and age also. Good one though.

  10. Lt Col Masood Alam (retd), Air Def says:

    Good one, thanks for sharing.

  11. Maj (R) Shahid Hameed says:

    The Paltan was 53 Punjab and the host was Ejaz Beg, the batman was Idrees, a wrestler of the Paltan. The Paltan today is 18 Sind.

  12. Dear Col Zahid Shah,
    It’s very funny anecdote about a simpleton Fauji of the bygone days. Please share more.

    • Col (R) Zahid Shah says:

      Thank you my friends and fellow veterans for your appreciation. As Shahid Kureshi said there are a lot more juicy one’s but we shall share them over a cup of tea! LoL.

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