Funny Candidate at ISSB Kohat

By Maj (R) Munir Ahmed (2nd SSC)

Maj Munir Ahmed (2nd SSC) 18 FF RegtEditor’s Note: Maj (R) Munir Ahmed is from 18 FF. After the retirement, he has settled in Lahore.

ISSB insigniaBack in November 1972,  I was on attachment with Karakoram Scouts at Olding Sector (Commonly known as Kargil Sector). An Army unit (57 Punjab) commanded by Lt Col Azad was sent there for the first time. Lt Col Azad had a marathon stay at ISSB, Kohat as GTO when he was a major. This real joke was narrated by him in the Officers Mess which goes like this;      

 Group Planning on Sand ModelMaj Azad, as GTO, was supervising a Group Planning exercise at ISSB Kohat. One candidate, who had village background, was made the commander. The requirement was to lead his team in carrying a few objects (On the Sand Model ) from one place to another, bypassing certain obstacles. The boy was very confused and did not know what to do. He wasted a lot of time in apprehending the situation and was running short of time.

His conduct was so irritating that despite the instructions for no interference, Maj Azad lost his patience and in quite desperate tone asked the candidate, “Gentleman, Can’t you use your head?

The boy took it as hint/ help from the GTO. He kept all the objects on his head, crossed all the obstacles and reached the point where he was supposed to.

Related Pages:
Humour in Uniform
Army Jokes (in Urdu/Punjabi)
Pakistan Army Blog (Retired Officers)

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  1. Col (R) Zahid Shah (46 PMA) says:

    Nice one! It’s always interesting and elating reading your anecdotes. Thanks.

  2. Lt Col (R) Naeem Ahmed Khan, Air Def says:

    Dear Munir,
    You are indeed gifted with an exclusive art of writing and narration. Please keep writing and let people enjoy reading. I honestly wait for your articles. I wish I had this skill.
    It is somehow unwittingly happening that we have not been able to physically see each other after our Passing Out. There in fact is so much to share, so much to recall. We all are withering fast. Our very close ones like Junaid Barlas, Azhar Ali, Habib, Ashfaq Recce and some are no more amongst us. May God bless their souls with highest places in Jannah. Aameen.

    • M. Pervez A. Minhas (49th PMA) says:

      Oh, I am grieved to hear about the demise of Maj Junaid Barlas. He and myself served together in 3 NLI at Kel sector during 1978-80. Just to narrate a lighter side, NLI troops used to call him Jin Balaa (Junaid Barlas). He was very fond of reading Cow Boy stories.

  3. Lt Col Masood Alam (retd) says:

    Thanks for sharing.

  4. Lt Col Khalid Masood Malik (Retd), 34 PMA says:

    I wonder how the candidate would have reacted if Azad had said “Can’t you use your brains”?
    I was a Term Comd with 55th PMA Long Course. During a short pause in an outdoor exercise I asked a cadet to locate a nearby village on the map for which I gave him 5 minutes. Since he did not turn up even after 10 minutes I called him and asked him if he had located the village. The reply he gave me was “I don’t ask the name of the village where I don’t have to go”. He ultimately retired as Maj Gen and an an instructor at the NDU.

  5. Brig (R) Aslam Khan (33 PMA) says:

    Good. Such anecdotes bring back one’s decades old interesting incidents, colleagues and fond & funny memories. Thanks a lot for providing smiles and catalysts of memory lane.
    God bless you.

  6. Maj (R) Azizur Rehman (15th War Course) says:

    While reading this anecdote, the readers must keep in mind the era of the event, i.e. prior to 1972. Even making upto ISSB Kohat was not a mean achievement by the lad, clearing all earlier stages of Tests and Interviews. There is collossal difference between a youngster of today and of yore years because of advancement of means of communications, etc.
    Anyway a good piece.

  7. Maj (R) M Ilyas Malik says:

    I appreciate, but in village life carrying things on head is quite common. These simple soldiers are very committed ones. They are braves & die-hard people. He deserved to be selected in my view.

  8. Maj (R) Rehmat Elahi says:

    It’s an affinity to simplicity. Good humour of the day.

  9. Maj (R) Khalid Saeed Shah, Arty (2nd SSC) says:

    It is called seventh sense, the PAINDOO wisdom(Sadha he Bharaa see), simple solution by simple TATERIAN. Well narrated sir jee. Many thanks for sharing.

  10. Munir Jee,
    Excellent retrieval, well narrated and well written – as usual – cheers!

  11. Maj (R) Malick Shaukat ul Islam says:

    Interesting anecdote.

  12. Lt Col (R) Qadeer Ahmed Ch. says:

    Good anecdote.

  13. Maj (R) Syed Iqbal Hussain Tirmizi says:

    Ha, ha ha!! Very funny!!

  14. Nice anecdote!! Thanks for sharing.

  15. Brig (R) Shujah Khurazmi says:

    Really deserved to be Recommended by Maj Azad. Such simple souls are our strength for defence of Pakistan.
    Long Live Pakistan!!
    Long Live Pakistan Armed Forces!!

  16. Maj (R) Hasan Jawaid (1st SSC), USA says:

    Really funny.

  17. Lt Col (R) Rashid Zia Cheema (2nd SSC) says:

    Dear Munir,
    Good anecdote. Please share more.

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