Army Jokes (in Urdu/Punjabi)

Editor’s Note: Visitors of this Blog are also welcome to contribute their jokes in the Comment box, the Editor would later make its Graphic.

Major not Laughing at Corps Commander’s Jokes

Funny Jokes in Urdu - Major not laughing at Corps Commander's Jokes - Army Jokes in Urdu

“Waikh Fauji, Agg laawaan teri Majbooriyaan noo”

Funny Jokes in Punjabi : "Waikh Fauji, Agg laawaan teri majbooriyaan noo" - Army Jokes

Full Dress Rehearsal

Funny Jokes in Urdu - Full Dress Rehearsal - Army Jokes in Urdu

Changay Phassay Aaan

Jokes in Punjabi : "Changay Phassay Aaan" - Army Jokes

Newly Married Couple

Jokes in Urdu - Newly Married Couple - Army Jokes

Kanjoos Major

Jokes in Urdu - Kanjoos Major - Army Jokes

American Soldier and the Lamp

Jokes in Urdu - An American soldier found a Lamp in Afghanistan - Army Jokes

Fauji Zindagi

Jokes in Urdu - 'Army Life' as quoted by a Subedar Major - Army Jokes

A Very Brief ACR of a Tall Major 

Jokes in Urdu - A very brief ACR of a tall Major - Army Jokes

A Captain’s Search for a Perfect Bride

Jokes in Urdu - A Captain's search for a perfect Bride - Army Jokes

Weeping Bride of a Captain

Jokes in Punjabi : Aik Captain ki roti howi Dulhan - Army Jokes

Second Lieutenant gives Wedding Gift to his Wife 

Jokes in Urdu - Laftain Sahib's Wedding Gift to his wife - Army Jokes

The Bickering of a Retired Fauji Bhai

Jokes in Urdu -The bickering of a retired Fauji Bhai - Army Jokes

Chaha Fazal Din, a Simple Fauji Pensioner

Jokes in Urdu - Chaha Fazal Din; a Simple Fauji Pensioner - Army Jokes

Anger of an Army Wife

Urdu Jokes - Anger of an Army Wife - Army Jokes

Clever Major who plays Bridge

Funny Urdu Army Jokes - Clever Major who plays Bridge

Army Officer’s Wife fed up of Bridge Playing Habit

Army Jokes in Urdu : Army officer's wife fed up of Bridge playing habit - Funny Army Jokes

Brilliant thinking of a Rangar Fauji 

Army Jokes in Urdu : Brilliant thinking of a Rangar Fauji - Funny Army Jokes

A ‘Tragic Story’ of an Army Wife

Army Jokes in Urdu : A 'Tragic Story' of an Army wife - Funny Army Jokes

The Corps Commander and the Witty ‘Rangar’ Subedar. A true anecdote contributed by Maj Zuha Saeed (12 OTS). Please read the anecdote “The Corps Commander and the Witty Risaldar”.

Army Jokes in Urdu : The Corps Commander and the witty 'Rangar' Subedar - Funny Army Jokes

‘Obedient’ Wife of a Fauji 

Army Jokes in Urdu : 'Obedient' wife of a Fauji - Funny Army Jokes

Classical Song on an Army Unit’s Raising Day Function 

Army Jokes in Punjabi : Classical Song on an Army Unit's Raising Day Function - Funny Army Jokes

A Civilian Friend asks an Army Officer about Army Life 

Army Jokes in Urdu : A civilian friend asks an Army officer about Army Life - Funny Army Jokes

‘Soldier Cut’

Army Jokes in Punjabi :  A shoe thief wants his hair as Soldier Cut - Funny Army Jokes

An Army officer Buys Three Cinema Tickets for Sunday 

Army Jokes in Urdu : An Army officer buys three cinema tickets for Sunday - Funny Army Jokes

‘Disturbance Pay’ for Army Officers . One can recall the comment of an ex British Defence Attache during the Zia’s years on Pakistan and Indian armies, ” Since independence both the armies have forgotten nothing and learnt nothing new “. This sums it up!
Joke made and contributed by Lt Col (R) Rashid Zia Cheema (2nd SSC).

Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : "Disturbance Pay" for Army officers - Funny Army Jokes

Drag Chute of F-104 Fighter Plane. A true anecdote contributed by Lt Col (R) Masood Alam (2nd SSC).

Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : Drag chute of F-104 fighter plane - Funny Army Jokes

A Retired Army Officer’s ‘Wishful Thinking’ 

Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : A retired Army officer's wishful thinking of another marriage - Funny Army Jokes

Funny Tune of an Army Band on a Captain’s Wedding 

Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : Funny tune of a Fauji Band on a Captain's marriage - Funny Army Jokes

Wah Ray Fauji Band!!!!

Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : Wah ray Fauji Band, Funny tune of an Army Band on an officer's marriage - Funny Army Jokes

Fauj Zafar Mauj

Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : Fauj Zafar Mauj, some Faujis in Hell - Funny Army Jokes

A ‘Unique’ Trick for Getting Leave 

Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : Aik Fauji ki chutti kay liye anokhi tarkeeb - Funny Army Jokes

Gul Khan’s Rifle

 Army Jokes in Urdu/Punjabi : Gul Khan's rifle is his honour - Funny Army Jokes

Related Page:
Best Jokes in Urdu & Punjabi
Army Blog (Retired Officers)

Editor’s Note: If you have liked this page, then please share it on FacebookTwitter or any other social media.
If it is not inconvenient, please do write a brief comment at the end of this page under the heading “Leave a Reply here”.
Visitors of this website are also welcome to contribute Army Jokes (in Urdu & Punjabi) by sending to:


  1. Amazing jokes!!! Pakistan Army is the best.

  2. Lt Col Javed Kamal Raja, Retd (56 PMA) says:

    Reminding sweet memories of this great profession!!
    Excellent collection!!

  3. Professor Zaheer Shakeel Awan, Institute Of Forensic Accountants of Pakistan (IFAP) says:

    Sir Cheema,
    Really amazing jokes. As Army Officer I like these.

  4. These fauji jokes are very good and I like these.
    I also like Pak army!!

  5. Seerat Abbas Niazi says:

    I am always with Pak Army; good effort…..

  6. Sir,
    Zaberdast! Mazzaa aa gya … I love these jokes.
    Yaqeen maanein baar baar parhnay ko dil karta hai… aur apni Army life pay nazar dalta hoon tou aur maza aata hai kay Officers aur jawan sub kay sub saaday loge hain.

  7. Javeria Nasir says:

    Very good jokes, I enjoyed it very much.

  8. ایک دفعہ ‘ڈایننگ ان نایٹ’ کے دوران ایک کور کمانڈر صاحب بڑے ڈھیلے ڈھا لے لطیفے سنا رھے تھےاور تمام افسران با امر مجبوری سن کر ھنس رھے تھے مگر ایک میجر صاحب نہ صرف ھنس نہیں رہے تھے بلکہ بالکل خاموش کھڑے تھے ۔ آخر جنرل صاحب سے نہ رہا گیا اور میجر سے پوچھ ہی لیا۔” میجر صاحب کیا بات ہے، آپ ھماری کمپنی انجوآئے نہیں کر رھے ھو؟” میجر صاحب جھٹ سے بولے ” سر دراصل میں آپ کے کور سے نہیں ھوں”۔ “

  9. Asad Ullah says:

    Good jokes!!
    Barri gull aye jee!

  10. Rana Muhammad Sadiq says:

    You have worked hard to collect these jokes. These shall amuse more to civilians or youngsters who have not read these before. Hum tou abb budhey ho gae hain suntay huey. Any way, still these brought smile to our face.

  11. Amama says:

    Superb jokes! Hamari fauj ki her cheez kamal ki hoti hai, jokes tou hahaha zabardast hain. Enjoyed a lot.
    Thank you so much for sharing these. Well done!!

  12. Hina Malik says:

    Good jokes!!

  13. Very cool jokes. Nice jokes, nice page!!

  14. Good effort. Nice Jokes.

  15. Hahaha superb!!!! I would say hamari fouj kay jokes, hahahaha.

  16. Really amazing and fantastic jokes, thanks a lot.

  17. Muhammad Shoaib Aziz (Tabouk, Saudi Arabia) says:

    Nice jokes, no doubt!!

  18. I am pasting your jokes on my Facebook page but all copyrights are still yours!

  19. Brig (R) Asghar Saghar (19th Long Course) says:

    Thoroughly enjoyed. Thank you.

  20. Lt Col Azizur Rashid (retd) says:

    Nice jokes. Keep it up!!

  21. Col (R) M. Afzal says:

    Enjoyed fully.

  22. Muhammad Mushtaq says:

    Good jokes. Keep it up.

  23. Brig Muhammad Iqbal Awan (R) says:

    Collation of all these Army jokes at one place is tremendous effort. Encouraged by this, others may be asked to contribute. Collection, collation and dissemination by Rashid Zia Cheema (the Editor) is praise worthy.

  24. Brig (R) Aslam Khan (33 PMA) says:

    Col Cheema (Editor),
    You made my day. Thoroughly enjoyed the jokes. Thanks a lot. God bless you.

  25. Maj (r) Zaheer Aziz says:

    Please upgrade your info. “Zinda fauji lakh da, retired fauji sava lakh da, Tay lateefoun wala fauji panj lakh da.” :)

  26. Salam,
    All retired Army officers are invited in “Veterans’ Own” Group. The link is given below:-

  27. Lt Col ( R) Syed Aejaz Ali Gilani (46th PMA) says:

    A good collection!!

  28. Brig (R) M D Malik says:

    I really enjoyed reading these jokes.

  29. Saqib Mehboob Janjua s/o Lt Col Mehboob Janjua, 7 Baluch (48 PMA) says:

    Dear Uncle Cheema,
    I am loving it…Yeh Dil Mangay Aur Ziada!!!

  30. Lt Col (R) Qadeer Ahmad Chaudhry (2nd SSC) says:

    “Mazedaar tay kararay Fauji jokes”.
    Well done, Cheema Jee!!!

  31. Sadaat Janjua s/o Lt Col Mehboob Janjua, 7 Baluch (48 PMA) says:

    Uncle Cheema,
    Good jokes in your website, you rock!!!!!

  32. Huma Shamsher says:

    Nice collection…..specially about ‘Saas’ (mother-in-law).

  33. Lt Col (R) Zafar Mustafa (6 OTS) says:

    Dear Cheema,
    Given your sense of humour, this page is bound to be popular with Forum members.

  34. Hasan Jawaid (1st SSC), USA says:

    Hilarious and entertaining. Looking forward to more of them.

  35. Nice jokes!

  36. Lt Col (R) Kamran Gul Abdullah, Engrs (2nd SSC) says:

    Dear Cheema,
    Nice ones. Its always a good refreshment after watching all the bullshit on TV. Well done. boss.
    I am reading the jokes to my wife about the wedding band and the Saas. We had a good laugh. Keep it up.

  37. Brig (R) Majid Azim (3rd SSC) says:

    Good Job!! “Jungle maen more naacha, kiss nay dekha!!” Only Col Cheema can see.

  38. Maj (R) Shabbir Ahmed (2nd SSC), USA says:

    Cheema Jee,
    Naiki da kum kar rahay ho, buddhay tay oonghday sheraan noo jaga tay hassa rahay ho. Good jokes, keep it up!!!

  39. Lt Col (R) Ansar Khas (2nd SSC), UK says:

    Wah! Cheema Jee,
    Maza aa gaya. Keep it up!

  40. Azam Gill (2nd SSC), France says:

    Excellent job, Cheema Jee, and it is certain to grow. We will all make an effort to water the tree.

  41. Lt Col Masood Alam (retd), 2nd SSC says:

    Well done Cheema!! Good job done!! You will get lot of jokes for this page. You may add my parachute joke in this page. Regards.

  42. Brig (R) Khawaja Alam Zeb (2nd SSC) says:

    Cheema, it’s good humour!! I appreciate your effort.

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